Everyday Dirtbag Entry #51.

How to get in a bouldering session at work:

Idea #2.

“The Casual Door Jamb Hang”:

Think how many doors you go through in a single day. Or if you don’t have any idea, count some time. On a pretty average day, I counted 79. That’s a lot of door jambs to just pass on through without getting anything in return.

So here’s my proposal. Take advantage of one in ten. And without arousing too much suspicion, get in a little hang on those eight or so doors per day. This is especially possible during the times when you talk to someone while standing inside the actual door frame. As you stand there, reach up and get an open-handed grip on the top of the frame. Sag your knees until your hands are taking most of your weight. Then find something to talk about that’ll get you all the way to the moment of pump. And before you start shaking or sweating, casually stand back up again and release.

For people who like clear directions:

1. Stop whenever possible underneath a door jamb.

2. Grip the top of the jamb.

3. Sag knees to weight the hands.

4. BS, tell a story, or ask questions until the pump starts.

5. Stand up and let go.

Simple, huh? The key is not getting caught, especially by the boss. But if you like to get away with stuff, see how often you can do the hang without attracting attention.

Drawbacks:

1. Once again, it’s weird to get caught in the act. You’re that guy who’s always hanging from door jambs.

2. Sweating, shaking, or untucking your shirt by hanging (How formal is your workplace?).

Variations:

1. If you’re not tall enough to reach the top of the door, you can do a one-handed side hang (still open-handed on the grip).

2. “The Pinch Casual Fall-Back”

3. “Crimp Locks” (switching hands).

Go forth and increase your workplace endurance.

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