Dear Anyone Who Has An Instagram From Your Baby’s Perspective,
Please don’t. That account isn’t cute. Your kid poops his pants and doesn’t speak English, and you’re not kidding anyone. You just want more attention. That’s what the internet has always been about for you. The little witticisms aren’t funny and the hashtags are even worse. No kid types #blessed. Or #momsgreat. Or #thatsmydad.
Also, I don’t want to point out the obvious here, but your kid isn’t even strong enough to hold a phone for a selfie. He doesn’t have enough facial muscle-tone to make Duck Face.
Finally, I don’t like YOUR instagram account. Why would I want another one also produced by you.